Besides worrying over her mother’s hyperthyroid condition at home and pressure from schoolwork, Trixie Teo was also battling intense peer pressure. She never quite fit in with the rest. Somehow she always felt different and ostracized by them. Feelings of rejection and an accumulation of problems started eating her up. With nowhere to release her frustration, she started spiraling toward depression. Soon it gave birth to panic attacks and depression. During these moments, Trixie would lock herself in the bathroom, crying uncontrollably. Banging on the door, her heart started racing and her body shivered with cold. Finally, one day she turned to mutilating herself with a penknife. These brief flashes of physical pain gave relief to her emotional pain. She quickly became addicted. She even started conversing with other self-harmers and consulting such pictures on the Internet to gain more knowledge.
So distorted were Trixie’s perceptions that she actually felt proud when the doctor diagnosed her with having major depression and anxiety disorder. She felt like she was one step closer to death. Thoughts of suicide entered her mind as she pleaded with God to let her die.
During this time, although Trixie knew about Jesus, she was not attending church regularly. One day, her teacher came to find out about her condition and immediately notified Alan who had no idea about his daughter’s struggles. However, God was once again faithful and His light shone through the intense spiritual darkness.
It was Saturday and Trixie was attending the Miracle Service with her parents when she heard a word from the pulpit. “Why do you continue to feed the devil?” Pastor Rony was preaching. These words pierced right into her heart and the Holy Spirit worked in her. Clarity came to Trixie and she realized that she was giving in to the work of the devil by self-harming. After that, she was able to stop every act related to it. Till date, she has no urge to cut herself or participate in any activity related to it on the computer. It was a miracle. She was set free.